My Top 10

In honor of the new year and all those annoying top 10 lists everyone provides, I thought I would give you all something a little different than usual: a personal list. The following are, in order, my favorite fucking activities:

10. Biting - There's something about the feeling of teeth sinking into me or mine sinking into another person..... try it. It's hot and it leaves lots of marks.

9. Noises - Moans and groans and growls, oh my ;)

8. Choking - There's a complete feeling of helplessness when there are hands around my neck and and mouth locked over mine. You resort to a sort of delicious desperation where your body wants to escape but wants to stay.

7. Rimming - If you've never felt a tongue in/around/near your asshole, you're missing out. It's so sensitive and wet, especially when you play with the surrounding area at the same time.

6. Pressure/force - I combined these into one because they're really related. Being held down into a bed, yanked around, squeezed tightly - it's that amount of control another person can exercise over you with their body, and it's incredible the amount of power that holds.

5. Clit Stimulation - I feel like this would be fairly obvious, but yes, it lies in my top 5. It's really necessary for any female sexual experience and enhances anything (let me repeat: ANYTHING) that happens during sex, or even messing around, for a woman. Plus, it'll make her orgasm. And how can you beat that?

4. Kissing - It's cliche, I know, but it's true. If you've ever encountered a good kisser, you know what I'm talking about. If not, let me introduce myself ;)

3. G-Spot Stimulation - There's a lot of stuff under this category, but the crucial ones are riding (the position, of course) and squirting. It's so deep and fulfilling, plus you can make me squirt. Congrats. :) I love giving this, too.... Seeing the look on a girl's face when I hit the spot and I know she feels it. Incredible.

2. Cocksucking - Have you ever had a cock in your mouth? The power of it if you're in control, the pure helplessness if you're not... Knowing that you're driving him wild just because you have his sex inside you. Segments of this that are crucial: ball-licking (because it's fun and you need to do this to actually do a blow job right for most guys) and deepthroating (because there's really nothing better than a messy, spitty blow job).

1. Dirty Talk - I feel like you might be disappointed that this ranks in at number one, but no matter what I'm doing, if someone walks up to me and starts telling me what they want to do to me or telling me how much of a slut they think I am, I'm turned on. I can't help it. And I can do this at any hour, of any day, in any form: verbal, hand-written, typed up online.... There's something very erotic putting your desires for another person into words instead of keeping it to yourself or just acting them out. Adds a little bit of sexual tension, and that's really always a lot of fun. ;)

I encourage you to go on your own little journey of self-discovery and come up with a list. Top 10, Top 5, Top 3... doesn't matter. But it's a lot of fun and it helps you get to know yourself better. It might make you realize your sex life is dull, or that you simply haven't found that thing that does it for you yet. No matter what, you'll be glad you made the list.

Happy Fucking New Year. :)

A Cultural Myth: The G-Spot

There is a magical little spot for a woman guaranteed to make her orgasm. That spot is the pleasure center for every woman, the best it can get for her. It’s a shifty spot, one that is highly elusive and yet completely worth the effort.

But guess what? That’s not the G-Spot.

The G-Spot, “discovered” by German gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg in the 1940’s, is actually the urethral sponge. The sponge can be anywhere from 1 to 3 inches into the vagina.

Image credit to http://www.vixennatalie.blogspot.com/

Some doctors claim that this spot doesn’t actually exist, but let me assure you that it certainly does.

The myth that the G-Spot is that magical location for a woman was popularized in the 1980’s and continues to be regarded as such. But it’s not.

Don’t get me wrong, for some women the G-Spot is a source of intense sexual pleasure. Remember there are even women who squirt from continued stimulation in this spot. But it’s essential to remember that this is not every woman.

The spot is difficult to stimulate though penile penetration, especially in missionary position, but other positions like doggy style and cowgirl hold more promise. The easiest way to stimulate it is with fingers. Insert a finger or two into the vagina and curl them up towards the belly. The area is particularly spongy and will definitely result in either intense pleasure for her or an intense need to pee.

Either way, you found it.

It’s not unheard of for a woman not to know where her G-Spot is, or not to get any pleasure from its stimulation. Most say that it makes them feel like they have to pee (which is unlikely to happen, no matter how strong the urge) and there are women who find stimulation of the G-Spot to be just plain uncomfortable.

For some women, the G-Spot is a hot spot for sexual pleasure, but it’s not THE spot for sexual pleasure. Unless you’ve found a squirter, there’s really nothing remarkable about the G-Spot. It’s just another erogenous zone of the body.

But don’t let me discourage you: that magical spot on the female body described at the beginning does indeed exist. It’s an essential part to any sexual experience for a woman.

And a topic soon to come. ;)

Squirting

On the off-chance you have no idea what I’m talking about, I’ll start with the science.

Female ejaculation, commonly known as “squirting”, is when a woman expels come amount of liquid from the paraurethral ducts through and around the urethra. The amount of fluid can be anything from a little trickle or squirt to a geyser-gush (seriously, look up Cytherea) and is released before or during orgasm.

The G-spot is generally the zone to stimulate in order for female ejaculation. In the majority of instances, a squirter will only squirt with G-spot stimulation.

Female ejaculation is more likely to occur after a woman has already orgasmed at least a couple of times and women with more toned PC (Kegel) muscles are more likely to be able to do this than other women.

The exact source of the liquid that comes out during female ejaculation is unknown, but currently the prevailing theory is that it’s vaginal lubrication with some small amount of urine. Others say it’s all urine. Still others say it’s something else entirely.

I’m with the still others category. To me, it seems unlikely that it would be vaginal lubrication all stored up because the liquid is actually far different than just standard vaginal lubrication. And it’s definitely not piss. This theory is likely brought to you by the same scientists who are still skeptics of the G-spot.

Female ejaculation is not uncommon, but not all women can do it. Once upon a time, women were embarrassed about this behavior because they thought that it was wetting the bed and doctors tried to cure the “unnatural” amount of fluid or supposed urine secretions. Today, female ejaculation is on its way to acceptance as a natural sexual occurrence. And even if it’s not, porn certainly gives it a lot of attention. Means someone’s gotta love it.

Those who can squirt are gifted. It’s not a sexual dysfunction or STD, just a natural talent. If you can squirt, don’t be ashamed of it, embrace it. There’s someone out there who’s going to love it and another couple of women behind that person jealous as all hell that they can’t do it.

Some people seem to be in love with squirting as proof of orgasm. It is absolutely not.

Let me reiterate: SQUIRTING IS NOT PROOF OF ORGASM.

People love the satisfaction of actually seeing their partner come to orgasm and cite female ejaculation as reward for a job well done. A couple of reminders: squirters can squirt before an actual orgasm and many women have orgasms without squirting at all. If you need proof that your partner has come and you can’t trust their moans and groans as a testament, you have a whole different set of issues.

Besides the proof aspect, many people find female ejaculation highly erotic. Just search “female ejaculation” and see how many videos pop up. There’s just something erotic about watching at least double the amount of juices stream down a woman’s legs, possibly creating a puddle under her, or turning her into a human shower for her partner. No matter what the specific reason, it’s definitely something.

As my dear friend Jack once said: It’s as real as my skull and it DOES exist.

And it’s hot.